Life at CorpX
Every day is an adventure. Some adventures are nightmares.
8:00 AM — Morning Ritual
Log into VPN (after two tries), triage overnight Slack panics, and steel yourself for the day's battles.
8:45 AM — Standup
Smile through status updates where no real blockers get solved, but Jira tickets get moved anyway.
9:30 AM — Calendar Theater
Attend strategic meetings designed to foster the illusion of collaboration without actual deliverables.
11:00 AM — Surprise Fire Drill
Scramble to resolve a client complaint that materialized into a P0 ticket overnight.
12:30 PM — Sad Desk Lunch
Microwave leftovers, read outdated Confluence articles, post a meme in #random.
1:00 PM — Focus Time (Interrupted)
Attempt to code or write docs while fielding Slack messages labeled "quick question."
2:30 PM — Existential Reflection
Briefly reconsider life choices before filing three more status updates.
3:00 PM — Innovation Brainstorm
Offer suggestions that will be politely praised and immediately shelved.
4:30 PM — Metrics and Reporting
Update dashboards to show "progress" and survive another sprint review.
5:30 PM — Shutdown Ritual
Log off, unsure if anything you did today will matter tomorrow.